"...The same night, five years ago, destroyed both of them. Two completely separate instances, two completely different places, two completely different people, yet the damage was the same."
She likes it quick and dirty.
I like orders and rules.
She hates small talk.
I hate to share.
She’s an open book.
I’m a closed dresser drawer.
She rides a Harley.
And that drives me f’ing nuts.
Annalyse and I have both lived in our own personal hells for half a decade. She’s learned to love the warmth, and I’m still consumed. But my new neighbor is stoking more than my libido these days. We agreed on only pleasure. But she changed the rules.
And now I’m not even sure what they are.
Maybe there’s a reason she found me that night, maybe there’s a reason I can’t stop thinking about her, maybe there’s a reason for the pain. Maybe not.
We all look for reasons in life. Reasons for death, love, pain. Why one thing happens and not another? It’s human nature. We’ve been looking for the meaning of life since the beginning of time. But maybe the reason for all of it — life, love, loss, heartache — is the curvy brunette living next door.
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Reviewed by Donna ~ 4 stars
***ARC received for an honest review***
“It’s the scars you can’t see that are the hardest to heal.”
The Reason for Me is a story about second chances whereby two people completely broken, cried off from love in all forms, meet and maybe find what neither one was looking for…each other. Both Holt and Annalyse were wary, hesitant and reticent when it came to members of the opposite sex, both burned in completely different ways, yet the damage was done. The same night, five years ago, destroyed both of them. Two completely separate instances, two completely different places, two completely different people, yet the damage was the same.
“…I have learned to love the fire, to crave the burn, to become the Phoenix instead of an arsonist who wants to burn the whole motherfucker down.”
Holt is a man, but he is a shell, an empty vessel. He goes from A to B but doesn’t take in his surroundings, he knows the routes and the routines, but that is all they are. His heart beats, but as a means to exist, the rhythm, the love…died and it is beyond resurrection. Holt is an OBGYN, he throws himself into work, works all the hour’s god sends and is always on call, he never takes a break, but work is his way of forgetting the past, relinquishing his thoughts, his grief and guilt, even if for a few hours and even if said guilt is totally misguided. This is a man that has been closed off for five years, a man that hasn’t even looked the other way at a woman, a man that has self-imposed loneliness and emptiness on himself, a man with no plans for a life outside of his work and his twin brothers. The sad thing…Holt had a lot to give.
“I’ve lost a lot of people close to me. I couldn’t survive losing someone else.”
Annalyse has spent the past five years running, running from her past, her memories, her life. Having been in the darkest, deepest depths of hell she is finally going to be in the same place for more than a month. Maybe it was time to stop running? Annalyse was a journalist/writer/blogger and her blog entries at times were hilarious as well as thought provoking and insightful. Now house sitting for her sister, she finds herself thrust into a community where everyone knows everyone and her solitude as she knew it was gone. Finally, it was time to regroup, to live, to be happy…maybe it was time to let go…
“Something beautiful coming out of something charred and black…”
One Ambien, one episode of sleepwalking and one dream or was it…has Holt feeling something for the first time, something not dark but hopeful. He dismisses it as a hallucination until the object of his dreams is actually his new next door neighbour. Will these two be each other’s band aids? Will their similar pasts push these two together or pull them apart? Love is powerful, love is painful, love has the power to heal and to destroy. Is love what these two need or is it doomed to failure from the beginning?
“…it’s not just getting love that heals us. It’s when we give love that we are healed the most.”
This was a soul searching read and one that I couldn’t put down. Holt was hard to read in the beginning but you knew that whatever he was hiding had to be big. Here was a strong, intelligent man that was emotionally spent, whoever had done a number on him had done it good and the damage may just be irreparable. Annalyse was an open book and her true thoughts and feelings always came through her blog pages which were often the light to the heavy of this book. The blog post became a highlight for me as each and every important milestone in her breakthrough of Holt became dissected.
“The pleasure wasn’t worth the pain.”
This is an emotional book, someone else’s pain is always a trigger for me and normally the waterworks are plentiful. I didn’t cry reading this one, yet I felt like I should have. For me the character connection was missing a little. As individuals I got them, as a couple I didn’t “feel” it. Maybe it was just me and the head space I was in when reading but for such an intense read I was looking forward to those cathartic tears, but they never came. In summary though this was a fantastic read, one that really tugs at those emotions and heartstrings. I loved it.
“You should have on a life jacket.”
“When I kayak or when I ride my motorcycle?” I ask.
He tries not to smile, but he does. “Pissed, huh?”
“Observant, aren’t you?”
“Motorcyclists are twenty-five percent more likely to die and five times more likely to be injured than a passenger in a car,” he says.
“You looked that up just to lecture me, didn’t you?”
“Not the point,” he says. “No more motorcycle.”
Did he really think he could go all alpha male on me? Usually, it would be hot as all-get-out to see a man in control, dominant, but right now alpha equals asshole! Note to self — I should do a blog post on that. Where have all the good alphas gone? “Who do you think you are?” I say, walking away. “You’re not my husband or my father. Come to think of it, I wouldn’t let my father or husband order me around like this.”
His fingers lightly touch my elbow. It isn’t a grab. I barely feel it, and as quickly as he touched me, it’s over. “I’m a doctor. I’ve seen what . . .”
“You’re a gynecologist! You’ve seen what a motorcycle can do to a vagina?”
Oh God, I’m in trouble. He’s got the dirtiest look in his eye. “I’d imagine the vibration would feel pretty damn good.”
I can’t help it and bust out laughing. “You are impossible.”
“And it’s the law to carry a life vest for every person in a kayak,” he says.
I roll my eyes. “You like rules.”
“I like order.”
“Ordering people around,” I say.
“Only certain people,” he says.
Don’t ask me why, but the thought of him “ordering” me around made my legs clench together, or maybe it was the mention of vibrations. Either way, the idea of him taking control of my body didn’t sound bad to me at all. It would be nice to not think so damn much all the time and just feel something good for a change.
About the Author:
Prescott Lane is the Amazon best-selling author of Stripped Raw. She's got five other books under her belt including: First Position, Perfectly Broken, Quiet Angel, and Wrapped in Lace, and her new release, Layers of Her. She is originally from Little Rock, Arkansas, and holds a degree in sociology and a MSW from Tulane University. She married her college sweetheart, and they currently live in New Orleans with their two children and two crazy dogs. Prescott started writing at the age of five, and sold her first story about a talking turtle to her father for a quarter. She later turned to writing romance novels because there aren't enough happily ever afters in real life.
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